Discerning Love: Day 4
Author: Andrew Comiskey
October 17, 2020
‘“Love is something more
stern and splendid than mere kindness,” as C. S. Lewis has said, and the most
unloving thing I could possibly have done to her [a friend with same-sex
desires seeking help] would have been to substitute some sort of mindless
“loving acceptance” for the very things that were killing her. It is one thing
to accept a person where he or she is, and another to accept their malignant
behavior that works against them as well as others. It is also one thing to
accept the real person who stands before you needing to be freed, and another
to accept (and direct a kindly tolerance toward) his or her carnal self who
dons whatever ‘face’ the occasion might call for while preventing the real,
creative self from coming forward. Jesus Christ never wasted His time, energy,
and prayer by helping a person ‘practice the presence’ of the old carnal self.
He didn’t converse with it or exercise the great virtue of kindness toward it.
He paid attention only by saying “Die to it!”’ (The Broken Image, pp. 117, 118)

Leanne did not linger with
persons who resisted the truth and who then tried to blame her for nearly
everything. She discerned something we all must if we want to help the broken: don’t
dialogue for long with persons who want to hold onto their sins. When we do, we
reinforce what is unreal in them. We focus instead on those who can’t wait to
leave the old self behind; these ones need our precious time and strength. And
we, like Leanne, need not be afraid of calling our wounded friends to realize
how they wound themselves when they refuse to repent. We then invite them to do
what Jesus asks of every Christian: ‘Pick up your cross, deny yourself, follow
Me.’
‘Jesus, give us discerning
love. Show us when someone’s lament is a defense against doing the hard work of
repentance. Expose the ‘victim’ who wants to blame us for wounding them rather
than look to Jesus to help take the next hard step to growing up. With our
help! May truth and grace kiss in our care for every suffering soul.’
‘Jesus, please confirm Amy
Coney Barrett to the US Supreme Court.’
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